Calm and organised?

In a recent coaching session, I was encouraged – indeed challenged – to think about what it is that my clients and colleagues thank me for. Like many people, I’m not great at thinking about what I bring to the party, or what others value in me, preferring instead to focus on what I feel I lack, what I could do better. Once I leant into the challenge, it was of course a hugely positive thing to do.

But it was also a surprising process.

One of the themes that came up was that people value me for bringing structure and order to confusion. For being clear-sighted and patient. Calm and organised.

Calm and organised?! I can hear my family weeping with laughter before I even publish this…! I live, if not in a state of perpetual chaos, then certainly continually on the run from one meeting, deadline or parenting obligation to the next… and if we run out of plates along the way, then I might finally admit I need to wash up or unload the dishwasher.

Calm and organised, I am not.

But for others, this, it seems, is what I bring. And so over the last few weeks I’ve been trying to lean into that, and to accept that strange fracture between the personal and professional because, as complex, fluid humans, it’s okay to be many things. The skill is to understand how and when to channel the right thing at the right moment, and to be accepting of the moments when we can’t do so.

For more information about how coaching works and how it might benefit you, please contact me for a chat – susie@yorkskinner.co.uk.